My Week in the Hospital
Things had quieted down — the piglets had been ordered, the army had not been reported to arrive imminentaneously, deliveries of sweets had resumed, and so on — so I thought that this might be the right week for me to take my week in the Hospital. Remember? A week of showing my mettle, and I would be enrolled in the Doctor’s Guild of Veray, and I would finally have finished something!
I had just been given the tour of the Hospital, why I don’t know, I was around all the time when it was being built, but I guess it’s traditional, when a big ship entered our harbour. Ships mean patients — for it’s a truth universally acknowledged that on a big ship there are sick sailors, even if they have just come from Essle and haven’t been underway for more than two weeks. Or maybe just because of them having just come from Essle.
And yes, the captain sent up half a dozen and one sailors, all sick with a fucking sickness. I had expected wounds, crushed limbs, half-drowned ship’s boys — this was a bit unexpected. Doctor Varyn looked at me with a bit of a — sardonic? is that a word? — grin, and told me to go get at them.
Oh well. I know I’m not a Grand Master, and that I cannot invent cures out of thin air, and that copper salve, cleanliness and time — and for the worst cases, tincture of mercury — would solve this, but, dash it, she grinned at me, and I was going to show her.
Sickness is sickness, right? It’s filth coursing through people’s bodies, and us semte can see that, but I have been taught how to filter it out! That’s what I thought and realized, and then I knew what to do.
These people obviously (to me, ahem) hadn’t been ill for that long, and a little questioning taught me that they had all gone to the same brothel, the same night, together, to have one last night of fun before sailing. And I knew I wouldn’t be that wrong if I’d assume that that meant they wouldn’t have had the sickness for more than two weeks.
Well, my assumption was that the filth would still be concentrated near their genitals (and mouths, so I checked for that, but apparently they hadn’t actually made love orally during their orgy, at least, hadn’t put their mouths close the sources of infection — weird, mouths and cunts are made for each other), and I just knew how to adapt the cure for the Silver Sickness for these people.
Five men, two women. I decided to start with the men.
I smiled at him and stroked his face, and asked him, “do you think I’m attractive?”
He got an erection immediately, it was visible even though he was covered with the standard issue hospital linen and blankets.
“Good, that answers my question. I’m going to make you come, and all the sickness will come out, and — Jeran, come here, I need you!” I called to Maile’s almost-boyfriend, “Jeran will burn the filth. And you’re going to keep that erection like a nice man, because I’m doing this to heal you, not because I’m your girlfriend or whore!”
He swallowed, and nodded, and I started on him. It was quite hard not to start sucking, he wasn’t ugly or repulsive or anything, and I would have liked doing that, it’s the only thing I really kind of miss, but I’m married, and he was sick, after all, so I kept within the realm of the medical, and when he came, Jeran zapped the seed as it came out, so I didn’t even get mussed. Good! I and Jeran took a good look, and he was clean, and would be able to sail on the morrow!
Only three more men to go — and then two women. And it was time for the noon meal, and I touched Moyri with my mind, and told her I’d wanked off three men, but she wasn’t impressed. I felt her smile at me with her mind, and she said, “I bet it was all just medical stuff!” So I answered, “Yes, but there’ll be two women as well.” And she sent her love my way and said, “Just get them cured, love!”
The last man was a bit of a problem, he wasn’t impressed with my tits, and I didn’t want to ask Jeran to help out, but he offered, and apparently young men are quite good at working out seed (and filth, but that was my doing) with their hands. You’d almost think they’ve got experience!
The first woman was easy as well, after Jeran had helped me shield my hands — no way not to get squishy if you help a woman to expel, and everything that came out of this woman’s cunt was filthy, but we managed to clean her up, all the while protecting ourselves. She did tell me that she would’ve liked a lover with my upper body and Jeran’s lower body, and thinking of that made me feel like it was a good idea that she was going off to foreign shores for a good long time, because I don’t want to contemplate that at all!
And then the last one…
I tried to make her spend for a long time, and while she obviously liked the attention, she didn’t spend. And Jeran couldn’t make her spend. I asked her, “If you’re someone who can go to a brothel and get infected, why can’t you accept that we want to make you spend?”
And she answered, “Well… It’s not that. I go to the brothels with my mates because they’re my mates, but I don’t really like it? I just make it look like I like it. They’re my mates…”
“So, what now? I cannot marry you, if you’re one of those people who only like making out with real lovers!”
“Oh, no, that’s not it. It’s something else — but I cannot tell you! Just give me the copper salve, and let me be?”
“Well, I guess you can tell me. I’ve had lovers since I was twelve, and I think I’ve had over twenty different lovers a year, sometimes more, so I’ve had hundred, hundred-fifty lovers, and they were all different. I know most of the tricks… Don’t worry about whether I’ll think you weird, just tell me?” (And in an aside whisper I added, “Jeran, please take a few steps back!”)
“I — I get my — not pleasure! — my discharge — out of being beaten? Really hard?” She broke down then and sobbed, “I’m the most disgusting person in the world, and I’ve never told anyone else!”
Now that was a poser. I hated being beaten! Everything I am, everything I feel, think, do and have has become kind of what was a reaction to seeing my Mother beaten, and being beaten myself…
“I… I have to consult with the other doctor about that,” was my very, very lame answer.
I talked to Jeran, and I talked to Doctor Varyn, and Jeran was still too silent for words, and Doctor Varyn told me, “Right, Khushi, you did find a very usable cure for the fucking sickness, but I think you should leave this patient to the traditional cure…”
And I looked up, and answered, “And let her mates know there’s something really different about her? She would be mocked the rest of her life! I know all about that! I’ve got a thing I like that I haven’t even dared tell Moyri about, and I think I am just going to tell her that I understand her, and I’ll help her — and if neither of you volunteers, I’ll ask Moyri to burn the disease as it comes out! Because I will make it come out!!!”
At that, Jeran said, “I will help you, but you will have to warn me to come into the room right in time, and I guess you’ll need to use the proper operating theatre room, too.”
Doctor Varyn nodded, in an austere way, and I went to wheel Arvi’s bed into the operating room. I undressed, I undressed her, I put in easy reach salve and oil, and then I started beating her.
I’m an expert when it comes to beatings, I’ve learned about them from a master expert! And I can dole out pain, as well as receive it, and hurt people, and be hurt, and… keep going. Arvi only wanted to be hurt, and that gave me so much pain, in my heart!
But pretty soon I could make a flash in Jeran’s mind, and he rushed in, and did his job, and we could rub salve onto Arvi’s body, and heal her wounds, even though she cried that she didn’t want that, she wanted to keep the hurt… Nobody had hurt her as lovingly as I had, she was moaning, and that scared me so much. When she got out of her rush, she asked me to marry her!
Doctor Varyn saw us coming out with the patient and told us to go home, and not spend the night in the dorms, even though that had been the deal: seven days and nights in the hospital and I’d get my name on the rolls. But Jeran was so sick with our last patient, that I agreed, and we went down to the Pink House.
Halfway we stopped, and had a good, long talk. I told Jeran about me, and about what’s good clean fun, and about what goes beyond, and that fun in bed is fun without boss and underling, but fun between equals, always! Power has no business being mingled with kisses. Touches are given, never extracted. Poor woman, but at least now she’s got something to dream about?
I felt sick to my soul, too, so it was good to have a normal guild evening, cuddling night, fucking morning with my wife, and all of that.
The next day, all of our sailors, including Arvi, had left, and I reported for duty again. I had a long, long talk with Doctor Varyn. She was wondering about my sanity, and I was wondering about that, too. It turns out that even for a girl with four Valdyan grandparents, having had more than a hundred bed partners before she was eighteen is not quite the expected thing. And there was me, always believing that being the boss of who might want to kiss me, and selecting them myself was making me very, very Valdyan.
Maybe most people don’t like to kiss (and the rest) as much as me? I put that proposition to Doctor Varyn, and, in her most impressive manner, she agreed. “No, most Valdyans aren’t that promiscuous, unless they get paid for it”, she said!
Well, ever since the night with the two yard-hands, I know the difference between whore and lover without any doubt! I like fucking, thank you very much, I think most of the people in the world are worth kissing and cuddling, and now I’m very, very monogynous, if that’s a word in Ilaini!
At that point, Doctor Varyn suggested I write a monograph on fucking. Or, at least, she said, I should write about the healthy and unhealthy parts, to make sure other doctors could benefit from my experience, and that she, personally, had no doubt about me having gotten out of all I had seen, experienced and been, healthy and in full control of myself.
So there! That’s what I’ve been writing in my notes for the past year, and more!
And then we got a new patient! A man, working on the wharf, and his leg was crushed, his knee was in a thousand pieces! It was wonderful!
And Doctor Varyn asked me! “Will you be able to treat this?”
And of course I could! I’ve — I’ve hung around and helped and been there and done things so often, in the hospital in Turenay, that I know this sort of job by heart!
Sure, it was tricky work, but it allowed me to come up close and get deep into his leg and knee, and after six, seven — maybe eight but surely not more than nine — hours, I had everything back in place, only to notice that there were half a dozen semti, our apprentices, around me, feeding me power and strength.
But, said Doctor Varyn, “That was beautifully done, Khushi! Now, don’t get a swollen head, and go clean the privies.”
Though I do need to take care I don’t get a swollen head, that was a joke, and I was put in a bed, and I fell asleep, but when I woke the next morning, I did clean the privies. And since there was no other patient, I bathed, talked to my patient, told him that all was well, and he still needed some weeks to recover, and then did the books, made sure all jars in the pharmacy had their labels in front and aligned, spent some time writing up notes at the front desk, swept and scrubbed the floors, made a big jar of sage salve and was ready to hide in the privy and diddle myself out of sheer boredom when Moyri touched me with her mind.
At first I thought she’d sensed what I was going to do, but no… The army was arriving!!!!! Twice as many soldiers as we’d been expecting, two thousand, excluding officers, sailors and — and — and — the new Baroness of New Dol Rayen. That’s the new name of Kushesh!
I had to run down to the Pink House, after asking permission of Master Varyn, of course, and get into my sheriff’s clothes and go down to the harbour, where Moyri was waiting for me. We had the Town Guard down there as well, thank Anshen for Halla, who is as dependable as, as, as — as anything! Great and Loving Anshen, I was so flustered.
So I did what came natural, I grabbed Moyri’s buttocks and we started kissing. It’s fun, I can really recommend kissing Moyri, her tongue can almost reach one’s tonsils, and it passed the time until the big ships started arriving in our harbour.
And with the first ship came the most important guests. The new baroness, Leva, and gosh! She looks just like what the King ordered. Trained in the law school, too! General Cynla astin Brun. Leva is a bit old, but very handsome, and Cynla is about my age, and cute enough that I started having dreams of a foursome… But instead, we invited our guests to the baths, and took them there.
Well, Moyri and I were sending each other little notes, by semsin, of how delectable our guests were, but discussed baths, lemons, sickness, army policies, the baron’s mail agreement and how we thought we could fit two thousand soldiers and a few hundred sailors into just about forty whores.
They had fifteen army captains, three majors, a bunch of naval captains and an admiral with them. This is just about the biggest Valdyan expeditionary army Athal has launched since the big war against the Khas. Bigger for sure than the expedition to Ashas. My, oh my! Our Athal is annoyed with Iss-Peran. No more Sire Nice King, from now it’s, Iss-Peran, know who is boss! Yay!
I got out of the baths pretty quickly, though, while Moyri continued the important discussions. I had to get Seran to organize accommodation and a banquet. I had to talk with Halla and sergeant Feran from the army about how we were going to organize shore leave and handle the incidents that were sure to happen.
Well… Feran told me he would take care of everything. Patrols, apprehension, punishment. I guess that’s what happens when an army takes control of a town, but I was pissed off all the same. Partly, I guess, it’s my swollen head, just like at the leper village, where I didn’t want much-better-qualified Doctor Varyn to do my work for me, part of it was, like, I need to make sure everyone knows I’m the last-but-one-final-authority here in this little burg! But there isn’t much anyone can do against an army this size, and I had, at least, the satisfaction that Halla agreed with me very much about being pushed out of our role as guardians of the town’s peace and justice.
Moyri is still such a pussy when it comes to make-up and clothes… I had to do her hair, her face, her dress… I did paint a little mouse on her crotch, head disappearing in her pussy, with ink, and only that prevented her from wearing a loincloth. She said, she’d feel like everyone would see that she was naked under her underskirts. Well, so would I be. And apart from that, even apart from the fact that she would’ve been naked under her loincloth otherwise, I’d seen Cynla undress, and she’s naked under her skirts too. Cynla’s also got an ink painting of a field of daisies, daffodils and cornflowers over her crotch — saw that when were in the baths. After she’d been shaved.
I guess Rhinla is making a killing with her new-found art skills!
When we were finally all nice and clean and painted and decorated and dolled up and dressed and so on… We had to ascend the cliff to the White House. Next time, Khushi — do let someone bring up the wherewithal and get all that done in the anteroom to the banqueting hall. But we fell in with a bunch of cute army captains, and arrived at the White House without mishap.
The banquet was fairly boring… As banquets generally are. We had food, we had talks — I had a good discussion with a certain Jichan astin Rhydin, a Grand Master in the guild of Anshen, about why there weren’t any Grand Masters in Selday, or even Idanyas, as far as we knew, and General Cynla really is a cutie, but with a will of iron, and then it was time to dance, and I had the first and the last dance with my wife.
That was divine!
I also danced with Leva, and she needled me about grabbing my wife’s ass while we were waiting for them to land, but I just pinched her buttock and after that, it was dancing.
But Dear and Beloved Gods — we have this army with us for five days, because one of the transport ships needs repairs in our docks. Five days!!!
And I guess I can forget about my week in the hospital…